Musing; Candle in The Wind

I have largely come to a comfortable place when it comes to death. I have come to accept it as inevitable. One aspect of death that is hard to wish away or think away or explain away is the pain of separation. Realizing that the individual is gone, forever, is a hard pill to swallow. 

Today, I remember. I never forgot her birthday, because of the way her husband called her. He called her "my sweet November gift from God." That certainly made her birthday unforgettable. This morning, I remembered her again. I would have cheerily written a post on her Facebook wall, wishing her a beautiful birthday. But, she's no longer with us. 

Olufunke Elusogbon-Adegbesan was a delight while she was here. She was a wonderful soul. I was not super close to her, yet, she made me feel like we were. I cannot ever forget her soft voice and her ever smiling face. When on the 19th of September 2010, I heard she had passed on, I was in a state of shock for quite a while. It just was not possible, she couldn't be dead! Alas, she really was.

Immediately, I remembered the last message she sent to me. She had asked me to call her so we could talk. She wanted to share my burden, she was offering me a shoulder. I replied her, I said I would, very soon. That's an offer I waited too long on. What I would have given to quickly snatch up that opportunity. But, I asked myself if that would not have made the pain of her passing much worse.

I learnt lessons from Funke's life. She gave. She gave of herself willingly and freely. She always had a kind word, always had a smile, always had time to stop and say hello. She loved God. That was so evident in her love for man. Despite her challenges, she was never going round with a long or sour face. She ruled her challenges, they didn't rule her. She was a really strong woman. She touched lives to extents she would never have known on this side of heaven. 

I learnt from Funke, that a smile might be all a hurting soul needs. I learnt to spend this costless but priceless currency freely. I learnt, from observing her, that not every argument deserves a response. Silence sometimes is mightier than a truckload of words. I learnt that verbosity falls before calculated silence a good number of times. I learnt the wisdom of few well chosen words. 

From the not to close relationship I had with Funke, she impacted my life. I hope to make such profound impact in the lives of those I come across too. Funke was sunshine. Funke was bubbly. Funke was indeed a gift from God, the very special November gift He gave to the world. She's sorely missed today. But, when I think of her, all I see is her smile.