Abby Speaks; Love Yourself Enough
Over the years since my divorce, people always ask me whether I regret getting out of my failed marriage, whether I'll like to go back to it and so on. Initially I used to consider such questions ridiculous considering the joy and relief leaving the relationship has brought to my life, but then I realised from the look on the faces of people that asked such questions that there are people that will rather stay in a bad marriage than leave for various reasons.
However, I find unbearable to live without love. Always being subjected to abuse, despise and scorn. Being hated and harmed by the person that is supposed to love and nurture you. Giving all of yourself and getting nothing in return. Being stripped of dignity on a daily basis. Battling with sicknesses brought about by depression, losing zeal for life and everything in it. Your self respect and worth being destroyed by the person that has made a covenant to love you, making life a living nightmare.
That is totally wrong. Marriage should be a union of two people walking in love, striving to better each other's lives through their partnership. And if one party to the marriage refuses to fulfil his/her obligations to the union, he or she is no longer interested.
In my own case, my ex wanted out of the marriage, lacked the courage to say so verbally but did with his actions. So I took the difficult but needful decision of ending the marriage. I gathered the broken pieces of my life together and started rebuilding. And every day since then, I thank God for giving me the courage to start afresh. I'm back from the land of the "Living dead" and I'm alive again.
Life is to be enjoyed and not to be endured!
Abiade Olawanle Abiola is a Lawyer with an interest in women’s rights, children’s rights, sexual and gender-based violence and
alternative dispute resolution. She has a high degree of professionalism, dedicated to exceptional quality and also an effective team player with outstanding communication and interpersonal skills. She is a member of the Institute of Chartered Accountants of Nigeria, Institute of Chartered Secretaries and Administrators (ICSA), The Chartered Institute of Arbitrators, Nigeria Branch, member of the Nigerian Bar Association (NBA), Oyo State branch and, a member, and the Social Secretary of the Federacion International De Abogadas (FIDA ) known as the International Federation Of Women Lawyers, Oyo State branch. She is the president of Human Of Substance Empowerment Initiative.
However, I find unbearable to live without love. Always being subjected to abuse, despise and scorn. Being hated and harmed by the person that is supposed to love and nurture you. Giving all of yourself and getting nothing in return. Being stripped of dignity on a daily basis. Battling with sicknesses brought about by depression, losing zeal for life and everything in it. Your self respect and worth being destroyed by the person that has made a covenant to love you, making life a living nightmare.
That is totally wrong. Marriage should be a union of two people walking in love, striving to better each other's lives through their partnership. And if one party to the marriage refuses to fulfil his/her obligations to the union, he or she is no longer interested.
In my own case, my ex wanted out of the marriage, lacked the courage to say so verbally but did with his actions. So I took the difficult but needful decision of ending the marriage. I gathered the broken pieces of my life together and started rebuilding. And every day since then, I thank God for giving me the courage to start afresh. I'm back from the land of the "Living dead" and I'm alive again.
Life is to be enjoyed and not to be endured!
alternative dispute resolution. She has a high degree of professionalism, dedicated to exceptional quality and also an effective team player with outstanding communication and interpersonal skills. She is a member of the Institute of Chartered Accountants of Nigeria, Institute of Chartered Secretaries and Administrators (ICSA), The Chartered Institute of Arbitrators, Nigeria Branch, member of the Nigerian Bar Association (NBA), Oyo State branch and, a member, and the Social Secretary of the Federacion International De Abogadas (FIDA ) known as the International Federation Of Women Lawyers, Oyo State branch. She is the president of Human Of Substance Empowerment Initiative.
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